The Family Tree

I learnt from Jim Weidmann (Focus on the Family Magazine : Feb/March 2003) to put up a family tree- a narrowly trimmed synthetic tree that looks like a Christmas tree. We also learn to put up a character tree from our children’s school- Character Montessori. At school, they use the Character First program to impart good character on children. At home, we follow do the followings for your family tree.

Self introduction of family members

The Family Tree is an important identity of your family. Parents can put a name of your family tree. It is usually used the surname of the family. For instance, you may name it as Fong’s (your surname) family tree. Parents ask all the family members to write a few important points about themselves in a small card that can hang on the tree. For example, they can introduce themselves by their hobbies, strengths, favourite food etc.

Recognize Good Character

We decorate family tree each month with different themes, such as forgiveness, attentiveness, patience, truthfulness and so on. When our children demonstrate good character, we write it down on a card and get our children to hang it on the character tree. For instance, I said to my elder son,” I appreciate your help to wash the dishes. You are very responsible and helpful. Thanks.” We tell him and affirm him for his good characters of responsibility and helpfulness. We can also build up his character and self esteem by affirmation.

Show appreciation to family members

We can teach our children the importance of showing appreciation and gratitude to the contribution of every family member. Showing gratefulness means letting others know by my words and actions how they have benefited my life according to Character First program.

For the younger children, we can encourage them to draw and we help them to write in a small card for hanging on the tree. For the older children, we can give them some guide to write. For instance, they can say thank you to their family member for doing something special for them. Just imagine the joy when you receive the thank you note from your family members. They will learn to give and receive thanks from one another.

Celebrate Special Events

In addition, we celebrate special events, like Christmas or birthday, by decorating the family tree with our children. We ask them for their wishes during Christmas, and celebrate their developmental milestone during birthdays. They learn to deliver a mini-speech during Christmas and birthday before getting presents. Then, we place their presents under the tree. It is a powerful tool to acknowledge our children for their progress and good character.